The Week in Bad Poems: Election Epigrams

Her campaigning’s kind of sucked,
But if she loses, we’re all fucked.

~

Trump is famous, Trump is rich,
Trump is Putin’s little bitch.

~

Has anybody lately seen
The plagiaristical Slovene?

~

“Basket of deplorables” was no gaffe.
The numbers add to more than half.

~

Skittles are not people, though
Donald Trump, Jr. thinks it so.
Next he will compare the Dems
To bags of melted M&M’s.

~

What will Trump’s taxes reveal?
That there is no art to his deal.
More — and that’s the saddest joke:
That Donald Trump is flat-out broke.

~

What, you ask, would Jesus do?
He’d vote for Clinton. So should you.

~

“I’m yuuuge,” said he.
“You’re a stooge,” said she.
“It’s sad,” said he.
“You’re mad,” said she.
“You’re fired,” said he.
“You’re tired,” said she.

~

She’s a liar and crook, she’s Wall Street’s slave.
She has MS and AIDS and one foot in the grave.
She fucked up Benghazi, carelessly lost her
Classified emails, murdered Vince Foster,
Left the brave men at Benghazi for dead.
Bill cheated because she would not give him head.
Instead she munched carpet because she’s a dyke.
On taxes, she’ll impose a big middle-class hike.
She’s for the XL pipeline and the TPP,
She screwed Bernie with her toadies at the DNC,
She wants troops in Aleppo, troops in Iraq,
She’ll send soldiers to fight there, and some won’t come back.
She’s slippery, she’s slimy, she’s really stuck up,
She’s shrill when she talks — please, girl, shut the fuck up!
…but…
Even if this all were true, and not just Hill defamed,
She still would be a better choice than He Who Can’t Be Named.

basketofdeplorables

Billy The Poet

About Billy The Poet

J. Edgar Nation must die.
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